Coachella 2011 Lineup - WORST COACHELLA EVER

Have fun, everyone. For the first time since 2003, I won't be there. Maybe I'll see you in 2012.

This is the WORST lineup I've seen in years. It's the only truly BAD lineup I've ever seen, I think. Goldenvoice is just trying to see how much money they can gross. And it's gross.

Guess I'll check out the other festivals.

Sigh.

-m

98 Days 'til Coachella - Glassjaw

Glassjaw is one of the first bands to be confirmed for Coachella 2011. I can hear why. It's not like they had anything else going on that weekend. Or ever.

I don't know where these guys come from, or where they've been, but I feel the same way about the White Castle wrappers I sometimes find in the street. I'm a little curious, but I wouldn't touch them with a ten foot pole.

These guys are nothing new, nothing original. At best, I'll be walking by them playing in the Gobi tent at like fucking noon on Friday when no one's there but their families and lesser-known skanks.

Not that you'd be able to tell them apart.

xxx days 'til Coachella - you motherfuckers stole my YouTube account

Happy new year.  Yeah, so you bastards had the "integrity" to have some pseudonym'd fuck called "Bill Fold" call me and tell me, "Yeah, we really want to work with you, we really want your YouTube username, just tell us what you want."

So of course I offered something totally out of bounds because Goldenvoice is a bunch of assholes who like to make money and care about music only as a means to that end.

Well, after several months passed, I got the equivalent of a TSA pat-down without so much as a herpes-laiden smooch.  They stole my username without even so much as asking if I'd care to be reasonable.

Well fuck 'em.  The Coachella page looks like shit, and of course, they've got a link to MY YouTube account, which they raped me for.

I'm honestly not as bitter as I should be.  When this happened, I decided that it was Goldenvoice, not Coachella, who screwed me.  And I stand by that.  Coachella is an amazing thing.  But let us never forget:

GOLDENVOICE IS A FUCKING CORPORATION AND THEY WILL VIVISECT YOUR FIRSTBORN CHILD IF IT MAKES THEM AN EXTRA DOLLAR.

And beyond that, there's no countdown on the homepage, so I can't even tell you how many days it is until the festival. (And NO, smartass, I don't care to count. That's what Web pages devoted to major festivals are for.

All this aside, I've been realizing lately that this will be my tenth Coachella, and unless they do something really amazing (read: BOWIE, BOARDS OF CANADA, EVERYTHING BUT THE GIRL, LAMB, TOM WAITS) I may be done with it.

So come on, you bastards, you can roll over the little guy, show me you still care about all the little people out here who are just waiting to see that one band they've never had the chance to see.  Don't give us another fucking Red Hot Chili Peppers year.  We need something big.  

You've got deep pockets.

Use them.